“Living well is the best revenge” – unknown
(Flourish and Prosper) “Sometimes others seek to crush one down, to make nothing out of one’s hopes and dreams, one’s future and one, himself…For whatever reason, efforts to improve oneself, to become happier in life, can become the subject of attacks…If one’s aims in life are worthwhile…if one flourishes and prospers, one certainly will wind up the victor.” – L. Ron Hubbard – The Way to Happiness – 1981
Today marks one year of doing nothing else professionally, but full-time research and study into spiritual philosophy applied to effective counseling, and actively counseling others for a fair and reasonable rate.
It is what I’ve wanted to do from the moment I finished my copy of Dianetics in 1993. It is what I’ve studied in the 20 years since, in almost every spare moment, while heroically taking on the responsibility of advancing and defending an organization purportedly established for that very purpose.
The fact that I have come to realize that the modern organizations of L. Ron Hubbard’s Dianetics and Scientology have betrayed that purpose (assisted mainly by the founder, himself), does not change that purpose of my own, in any way.
I am not going to lie and say that I am happy in every way with my current situation (refer to my articles on losing my wife to Hubbard’s enforced disconnection policies), but I do have something here to be very thankful for.
For the first time in my life of so-far 49 years, I am working at something that I truly love to do, and making a decent living doing so. I work for myself and for my clients. I help people who have been happy with that help. And I have time to spend studying and researching improved methods of doing so, which methods also enrich my existence beyond easy description.
First of all, let me say that I could not have done this without my family, friends and like-minded associates who supported me, while I recovered from almost nothing and came from almost nowhere, to do it. I will not forget that.
But I am proud today that I have achieved things I never dreamed possible, mainly by sticking to my integrity and doing what I knew was right.
As always, some have turned against me because they were not ready to shine truth and honesty in dark places. And I understand – I recognize I have a very long way to go, myself.
Anyone connected to the corporate ‘church’ of Scientology has willingly turned a blind eye to a lot of suffering and injustice. It is a long, long process to recover one’s integrity after all that.
It is no use comparing oneself to others. I have learned that all you can do is to follow your heart where it leads you, stand as firmly as you ought, in your integrity, as it leads you upward to higher spiritual awareness, and compromise only as much as you absolutely need to, in order to maintain the cooperation of those around you that you might otherwise alienate through sheer speed of change.
I am just happy that my dream of professional success has become a living reality.
I have recovered financially to the degree of having fully made up for squandering my teacher retirement on the way to participating in a misguided effort to help an organization “help mankind.” In fact, I have recovered many times over.
My retirement is secure, my health is fantastic, and my life’s work is a joy.
I cannot honestly say that I “have it all” – but what I can say, is that I am thankful for this fulfillment in establishing my own career at a level that I never imagined could happen in the space of one year.
One year ago today, I started counseling with my first paid client. Today, he/she, among many other of my clients, is enthused with counseling, independent from religious organizations, and counseling and helping others using similar successful methodologies.
It is time for a new model. Religion and science have failed us so many times. But a movement of spiritually-minded, responsible and helpful people exists whose work is to formulate a healthy balance of ‘Know Thyself’ and helping to actively improve conditions around us.
“Become the change you want to see in others” is the guiding principle. And any techniques that help others without adversely affecting their self-determinism and dignity in any way, are valid processes to be used in helping each other achieve those goals.
People associated with the Church of Scientology or the alternative Independent Scientology or FreeZone Scientology have nothing to fear from me in the long run, despite some of the “Disconnection” and even “Fair Game” practices, that have continued to come my way from some of the above. I am going to continue to tell truths – however inconvenient – in as compassionate a way as I can, until all of the dynamics of life and spheres of existence straighten out and start making sense to me and begin to work for the common man who seeks answers.
Just one month before L. Ron Hubbard started pulling down a vital movement into one long, painful process of pulling ‘the shades of night’ on the very technology that hundreds of practitioners worked their hearts out to establish, he wrote these words that I have lived by since the day I read them:
MY PHILOSOPHY (excerpted)
“The study of philosophy is very ancient. The word means: ‘The love, study or pursuit of wisdom, or of knowledge of things and their causes, whether theoretical or practical.’
All we know of science or of religion comes from philosophy. It lies behind and above all other knowledge we have or use.
For long regarded as a subject reserved for halls of learning and the intellectual, the subject, to a remarkable degree, has been denied the man in the street.
Surrounded by protective coatings of impenetrable scholarliness, philosophy has been reserved to the privileged few.
The first principle of my own philosophy is that wisdom is meant for anyone who wishes to reach for it. It is the servant of king and commoner alike, and should never be regarded with awe.
Selfish scholars seldom forgive anyone who seeks to break down the walls of mystery and let the people in…
…Know thyself … and the truth shall set you free…
…We are only concerned with how to show man how he can set himself free.
This of course, is not very popular with those who depend upon the slavery of others for their living or power…
Suppression and oppression are the basic causes of depression. If you relieve those a person can lift his head, become well, become happy with life…
…I like to help others and count it as my greatest pleasure in life to see a person free himself of the shadows which darken his days.
These shadows look so thick to him and weigh him down so that when he finds they are shadows and that he can see through them, walk through them and be again in the sun, he is enormously delighted…
…So my own philosophy is that one should share what wisdom he has, one should help others to help themselves, and one should keep going despite heavy weather for there is always a calm ahead. One should also ignore catcalls from the selfish intellectual who cries: ‘Don’t expose the mystery. Keep it all for ourselves. the people cannot understand.’
…For I know no man who has any monopoly of wisdom of this universe. It belongs to those who can use it to help themselves and others.
If things were a little better known and understood, we would all lead happier lives.
And there is a way to know them and there is a way to freedom.
The old must give way to the new, falsehood must become exposed by truth, and truth, though fought, always in the end prevails.”
Re-read if you will, those words carefully, for they were carefully chosen. It is my intention to take the man at his word (I left out the fibs about his past!), regardless of the betrayal that started soon after, with the penning of “Keeping Scientology Working” – those little increments of force and not-so-little outright lies about ‘source,’ replacing more and more of the ‘Affinity-Reality-Communication’ on which the subject is purportedly based.
And you think I am ‘1.1’?
(inside joke – means a person very hypocritical in actions relating to his words)
Be careful here – I am not asserting I am a “better man” or “smarter” or anything like that. We are all deeply flawed human beings – probably without exception. And I know that Hubbard faced real enemies in repressive government operations. It is anyone’s responsibility to do their due diligence and establish the truth for themselves. I am just saying that promises have been made, and that they are not superseded by someone’s insane effort to monopolize the subject “for our own good”:
“So anybody that knows the remedy of this subject—anybody that knows these techniques—is himself actually under a certain responsibility; that’s to make sure that he doesn’t remain a sole proprietor. That’s all it takes; just don’t remain a sole proprietor. Don’t ever think that a monopoly of this subject is a safe thing to have. It’s not safe. It’s not safe for man; it’s not safe for this universe.”
L. Ron Hubbard
(from Philadelphia Doctorate Course lecture #20 “Formative State of Scientology, Definition of Logic”, given on 6 Dec 52)
For too long I have endured the cognitive dissonance of the outright denial of this promise to mankind by the church, its misguided parishioners, and now in the “independent” field by those still indoctrinated into blaming everyone but the ‘Master’- who have yet to discover the depth of betrayal we have all been subjected to.
So I remain a permanent ‘Class 0+’ counselor. It’s all I will ever seek to attain as far as “official” credentials. Why? Because Class 0 covers the true essence of what makes auditing work. Because the years it took me to earn this status inside the church gave me all the metering skills needed for any level. Because I ‘studied ahead,’ with honesty and integrity, earning my status of ‘auditor’ with dozens of successes above my grade, even while ‘in’ the church. And because I protest the waste of thousands of lives waiting for the “approval” of “authority” to help one another with so many common-sense procedures designed for the purpose.
Auditors are made by auditing, and that’s just the way it is. Professional integrity grows with results attained, and while training and internship is still recommended as one potential service of great value, it must never again become the only way.
Never misrepresent your level of experience or offer what you are not sure you can deliver, and you will do fine.
So to conclude all this, I am at heart, a philosopher – a lover of wisdom – and it is very rare, historically, to be able to make a living in this field. I started my new professional career with 20 years of applied study, and a full year of intensive co-processing covering every important basic procedure available, up through the highest graduate level actions. Now, a year of very satisfied clients has shown me that it can be done.
And now I am available to help you do it, if you happen to share that purpose.
And I thank those who have stayed with me – or even showed a little kindness and help along the way – from the bottom of my heart.
I live amidst a slowly fading tragedy – the loss of my becoming-soul-mate wife of 9 years, and the loss of my religion of 18 years – but despite all that, I can claim and enjoy, a victory here. One which helps me greatly in the journey to become more and more free – more and more ‘me.’
And that, being a big part of my purpose, makes me happy.